Work Struggles/Considering Foster Care

by Amanda
(Virginia)

My daughter is 18 months old. Her father has never acknowledged her, especially since we weren't in a relationship when she was conceived. I don't receive child support. The state lagged on paperwork and it was too frustrating to deal with. I've bounced around with family members in different states, trying to 'get my act together'. I was starting to feel like I had, staying with my grandparents, but they upped the ante and pushed us out of the nest too soon. I had no money saved up when we got our own place, and it's farther from my work now (almost an hour, considering I still drop my daughter off at their house and it's not exactly on the way).

My work performance is faltering. My boss piles on additional duties even though she knows I can't stay late. I have a meeting tomorrow to discuss a department transfer for myself, which I feel like I will not get. I requested a transfer to another store (one closer to my house), they made me chase them around rather than tell me the new store had no interest in letting me transfer there.

I'm considering giving my daughter to relatives to raise for a while (or foster care), so I can go to another state (with a higher minimum wage and more education opportunities) and more or less live out of my car until I can build myself up and take care of her again.

I really don't want to. But I can't make it on minimum wage and I have no time for schooling or money to do it. I am really at a loss. I would miss my daughter terribly and honestly at this point, I don't see her nearly as much as I should.

I almost... wish they would hurry up and fire me, so at least I could see her a little more. I feel like they're taking advantage of my situation as a single mother to make me work like a dog and then punish me when I don't 'meet their expectations'--that they're constantly raising. I tried to tell them that I needed the extra help, but my manager makes it so that she receives extra assistance and I don't, and since I close the department most nights... if work isn't finished, I have to stay late (and sometimes not even get to see my kid for an entire day or two) or take the criticisms. I've looked for other work--I always seem to miss the hiring managers or their calls because I'm at work or they're not in when I have free time. Or, they just forgot to take down a job posting.

Everyone says I need to go to school. I just feel like... I don't have time. Online programs are so limited, and I really want to be in a classroom because it would also give me the social interaction that I miss out on.